Consuming...

[jenioctavia]

Class was good today. Professor Hamm is awesome and I think my classmates actually like me.

But...I'm really not thinking about that right now. See, I got another call today...

Gall blatter infection, possible heart valve problem that may require major surgery, and dyalsis graft has to be removed. All this means that they're going to have to move her to a downtown Portland hospital.

I am...so..so...SO very scared right now. I don't...I have no real way of knowing if she's going to pull out of this. As it stands, heart surgery is a major ordeal, and there's the possiblility she might not be strong enough to recover from it.

I'm tired of being alone...I'm tired of worrying...I feel...so forsaken right now...

I'm questioning everything. Everything. Why has She not heard my prayers? All I ask is that Mom be alright...what is the sense in taking her from me now? What is the purpose...

I don't know what to do...

Comments

[shayachern.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry love. I wish I could be down there to give you a hug and some comfort, just know that I am thinking about you, okay? And remember, this could be a trial that your mother is supposed to go through in her path through time. Another lesson that she needs to learn in order to advance. And also remember that you can't just pray to the Goddess and have your prayers heard and answered. That would just be a feminine form of Christianity. You need to be pro-active. Meditate on this. If you have access, do some form of divination. ANd if that divination says that it would work, do a ritual to send her love and healing energy. Just be careful. Because this could be when she is scheduled to go, and if your ritual works, and she makes it through when she should be passing on, her spirit could start to "degrade," and she would be only a shadow of her former self. So think on all of this okay? And if you need me, you know my number.
I love you, and I hope you don't get angry at me for saying all this.
Obsydian

*hug*

[katedavey.livejournal.com]

Dear Jeni

I'm incredibly close to my mother, who has had her fair share of hospital time. She too had a gall bladder problem, except hers ruptured and it had to be removed completely. She is still alive and extremely fit for a woman of 52. I can only imagine what you're going through, it must be absolute hell. I'd totally freak if my mother wasn't around. I am sure that if it's not her time to go, she'll be back home with you in no time :) If you're anything like her in personality, she's a fighter. Which increases her chances. Im not an incredibly spiritual person, i mean, i have my tarots done every few months, but i reckon she'll be just fine. Just an inkling ;)

Take care of yourself for god's sake! (And your mums!!)

Love Dora Loamsdown (Figured you wouldnt know who the smeg Kate Davey was lol)