(no subject)
Jul. 7th, 2004 08:06 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jenioctaviaI'm sore, I'm tired, my shoulders feel like some one is taking a blowtorch to them, and I really should be getting ready for class...
BUT
There are some things I need to say before I do leave, and they will be said to specific people. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then obviously you're not a part of the guild. I won't say names, or point fingers in any one direction. You're all guilty of it, as am I.
That doesn't mean I'm not tired of it, though. I am. Very tired of it.
Since five years ago my life has been nothing but drama, drama, darama and a series of depression and suicidal urges egged on by alot of things, but in no small part due to the constant and perpetual bickering of my friends. I was really hoping to get out of that by the time graduation was nothing but a memory and my life was more about what I wanted to do rather then what I had to do, Furcadia being one of things things. But for the past year or so, not too shortly after arriving, its been a text replay of those years at Mazama. I asked time and time again that people try to refrain from it as much as possible. I asked that people be civil towards one another, even if for whatever reason they didn't particularly care for the person in question. Really, its not that hard to just suck it up and act nice. The person can know you absolutely loathe them and you can STILL put in an effort. I know this because I do it every damned day, online and in the real world. It doesn't take a kick in the head to realize that being forcefully civil is alot more pleasant then screaming and yelling. It gets old, fast. It creates negative energy that only makes the enviorment less and less easy to deal with those who try desperately to remain nuterual. And yes, I've had my moments of fights, too, but don't think that I don't regret it later on, even if it is some one I don't like.
You are ALL my friends, you are all like family to me and I love you all equally. Even the people I don't like for whatever reason I still have a certain respect for. And all the bickering and fueding makes people like me who try to stay on the outside of it TAKE sides, whether your mean it to happen or not. I don't want to turn aganst any of you, and I won't, not for an extended period of time anyway.
Honestly, I'm mad at everyone right now. But not enough to desert you. I'm staying on Furcadia, I'm still RPing at TRC, but don't expect me back in the OOC area. I'm done with it. None of my requests are going to be aknowlaged so I'm just going to ignore it all together, once and for all. I'm sick of the negativity, its taking a toll of stress on me like you wouldn't believe, and I'm pretty damned sure I'm not the only one who feels that way. A part of me is even a little dissapointed, because I know there are quite a few of you who can be alot more mature then that.
I don't love any of you any less, though. If you want to talk to me, I won't ignore you. If you want to IM me, my AIM is always open. You want my advice on something, or just want to show off some project that you take pride in, go for it. You want to RP, pounce on me in Imag and let me know. I won't turn anyone away just because of this. I'm distancing myself from that place for my own reasons and purpose, and I can only hope that no one takes offense to this.
All right, time for school.
/soapbox
BUT
There are some things I need to say before I do leave, and they will be said to specific people. If you don't know what I'm talking about, then obviously you're not a part of the guild. I won't say names, or point fingers in any one direction. You're all guilty of it, as am I.
That doesn't mean I'm not tired of it, though. I am. Very tired of it.
Since five years ago my life has been nothing but drama, drama, darama and a series of depression and suicidal urges egged on by alot of things, but in no small part due to the constant and perpetual bickering of my friends. I was really hoping to get out of that by the time graduation was nothing but a memory and my life was more about what I wanted to do rather then what I had to do, Furcadia being one of things things. But for the past year or so, not too shortly after arriving, its been a text replay of those years at Mazama. I asked time and time again that people try to refrain from it as much as possible. I asked that people be civil towards one another, even if for whatever reason they didn't particularly care for the person in question. Really, its not that hard to just suck it up and act nice. The person can know you absolutely loathe them and you can STILL put in an effort. I know this because I do it every damned day, online and in the real world. It doesn't take a kick in the head to realize that being forcefully civil is alot more pleasant then screaming and yelling. It gets old, fast. It creates negative energy that only makes the enviorment less and less easy to deal with those who try desperately to remain nuterual. And yes, I've had my moments of fights, too, but don't think that I don't regret it later on, even if it is some one I don't like.
You are ALL my friends, you are all like family to me and I love you all equally. Even the people I don't like for whatever reason I still have a certain respect for. And all the bickering and fueding makes people like me who try to stay on the outside of it TAKE sides, whether your mean it to happen or not. I don't want to turn aganst any of you, and I won't, not for an extended period of time anyway.
Honestly, I'm mad at everyone right now. But not enough to desert you. I'm staying on Furcadia, I'm still RPing at TRC, but don't expect me back in the OOC area. I'm done with it. None of my requests are going to be aknowlaged so I'm just going to ignore it all together, once and for all. I'm sick of the negativity, its taking a toll of stress on me like you wouldn't believe, and I'm pretty damned sure I'm not the only one who feels that way. A part of me is even a little dissapointed, because I know there are quite a few of you who can be alot more mature then that.
I don't love any of you any less, though. If you want to talk to me, I won't ignore you. If you want to IM me, my AIM is always open. You want my advice on something, or just want to show off some project that you take pride in, go for it. You want to RP, pounce on me in Imag and let me know. I won't turn anyone away just because of this. I'm distancing myself from that place for my own reasons and purpose, and I can only hope that no one takes offense to this.
All right, time for school.
/soapbox
