Can you stop the lies...
Jul. 3rd, 2004 12:22 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jenioctaviaOkay, so I got the job. I should be happy. I AM happy. Excatatic even. But getting a job is just one in a thousand steps to moving on, to getting back to my life after...
*sighs* It just wasn't the best idea for me to watch Heros Part 2 alone tonight. That's the episode that Dr. Janet Frasier dies, and it is nothing short of a bawlfest. The only real moment when I wasn't crying or about to cry was when Daniel knocked on the door of the airman she saved after he'd gone home to recover. That damned teddybear was so cute. ^^;
http://fragilebalance.com/heros_2/_158.jpg
Her dying was something that hit close to home for me because of the reactions of SG-1 and Genneral Hammond. That whole...family thing. Yeah. But that wasn't the worst part of the night.
After it finished I had to go out and clean the car completly. Yeah. Mom's Chevy Lumina. I mean...its just a car...
But its a car that we traveled in..alot. My memories were pretty closely tied with that car, among other things. We went all over Portland in that car, got lost in it, had some of our best conversations in it, sang our heads off to songs like In My Daughter's Eyes and What Was I Thinkin'...had...fun there. It wasn't -just- a car it was a part of us, who we were. Hell, I learned most of my driving in that car, and now because I don't have the rest of the payments for Don, he's going to take it away, just like that.
After Forest helped me get the big stuff out I grabbed her beaded hippie rainbow off the rear view mirror and just...sat there for a while. Felt the wheel for the last time, touched the seats, looked at the radio and the doors and the floors that took so much abuse from us...
I keep trying to tell myself that it really is just a car, but I know tomorrow when it goes I'm going to cry. So needless to say, I'm dreading the morning...
*sighs* I miss you Mommy...I really do.
I wish you here tonight with me to see the northern lights
I wish you were here tonight with me
I wish I could have you by my side tonight when the sky is burning
I wish I could have you by my side
Cause I've been down and I've been crawling
Won't back down no more
Can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
Down on me, I'm still standing
Can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
Conscience clear, I'm still standing here
burns like a thousand stars, though you are light years away
burns like a thousand stars or more
you're up there, you're always with me
smiling down on me
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
It's something sacred, something so beautiful
something quiet to ease my mind
when the pressure's taking me over and over
cause I've been down and I've been crawling
pushed around and always falling
you're up there, you're always with me
smiling down on me
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing here
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
*sighs* It just wasn't the best idea for me to watch Heros Part 2 alone tonight. That's the episode that Dr. Janet Frasier dies, and it is nothing short of a bawlfest. The only real moment when I wasn't crying or about to cry was when Daniel knocked on the door of the airman she saved after he'd gone home to recover. That damned teddybear was so cute. ^^;
http://fragilebalance.com/heros_2/_158.jpg
Her dying was something that hit close to home for me because of the reactions of SG-1 and Genneral Hammond. That whole...family thing. Yeah. But that wasn't the worst part of the night.
After it finished I had to go out and clean the car completly. Yeah. Mom's Chevy Lumina. I mean...its just a car...
But its a car that we traveled in..alot. My memories were pretty closely tied with that car, among other things. We went all over Portland in that car, got lost in it, had some of our best conversations in it, sang our heads off to songs like In My Daughter's Eyes and What Was I Thinkin'...had...fun there. It wasn't -just- a car it was a part of us, who we were. Hell, I learned most of my driving in that car, and now because I don't have the rest of the payments for Don, he's going to take it away, just like that.
After Forest helped me get the big stuff out I grabbed her beaded hippie rainbow off the rear view mirror and just...sat there for a while. Felt the wheel for the last time, touched the seats, looked at the radio and the doors and the floors that took so much abuse from us...
I keep trying to tell myself that it really is just a car, but I know tomorrow when it goes I'm going to cry. So needless to say, I'm dreading the morning...
*sighs* I miss you Mommy...I really do.
I wish you here tonight with me to see the northern lights
I wish you were here tonight with me
I wish I could have you by my side tonight when the sky is burning
I wish I could have you by my side
Cause I've been down and I've been crawling
Won't back down no more
Can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
Down on me, I'm still standing
Can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
Conscience clear, I'm still standing here
burns like a thousand stars, though you are light years away
burns like a thousand stars or more
you're up there, you're always with me
smiling down on me
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
It's something sacred, something so beautiful
something quiet to ease my mind
when the pressure's taking me over and over
cause I've been down and I've been crawling
pushed around and always falling
you're up there, you're always with me
smiling down on me
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
can't you stop the lies, falling from the skies
down on me, I'm still standing here
can't you roll the dice, I might be surprised
conscience clear, I'm still standing here
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Date: 2004-07-03 05:00 am (UTC)(the original Amy Lee community)
please join amy_lee_fans
sorry for spamming your journal
-ferretsnax